It's just my junk

We all have junk in our heads. This is mine.

Archive for the tag “Attitude”

Market what is worth marketing

I have learned from the corporate world, your image and marketing is vital in being known and your reputation based on that image (brand) carries as much weight if not more than the actual brand.

For example,  the big three (Chevy, Ford and Dodge) had been invincible in the automotive industry for ever but a couple Foreign companies, Toyota and Honda began to make their mark. But the big impact was when the foreign market invaded the USA with quality product just the time the US companies had a major issue with their vehicles. The decline wasn’t due to one or the other but both. Their brand was damaged in a major way, while a new brand was introduced to be more reliable at the time. It wasn’t a big deal but has come to change the USA.. Nascar now has Toyota in the series and they win regularly.

There are two forms of branding that occurs in a brand..

  1. the individual who wears or shares the brand
  2. the brand itself and product it represents

The company or product rests heavily on the two above mentioned forms. Simply put if your individual makes a poor choice (for example Tiger Woods) in his or her personal life it will impact your brand (product). This happens in the world through governments, it happens in the business world and in the church too.

We have to be realistic and remember people are people who make mistakes and product is product that (like the automotive mentioned above) breakdown. But the balance between the two is so very important to both successes.

On one hand we need to be intentional about who we support and how we support them. We can’t simply buy into a product because someone uses it.. Even if it is Jordan (mental note. I am wearing them as I type) when we don’t like or use the product as it is intended. We simply can’t use a product without realizing what it is intended to market.

(Now I am all for freedom of speech but to be honest I will not be boycotting companies because someone on Facebook or a celebrity tells me to without doing the homework. If we fall to everyone’s opinion we will be switching and boycotting everything including church but I will and encourage you to use to use wisdom in who and what you support or do not support.)

Our brand will say a lot about who or what we are. It is a style for some. Remember when Shaun White was known for his long red hair… yeah he cut it or when McDonalds was more than a golden Arch or Nike was more than just a swoosh. I also could share some that do not carry as much joy… but will not here.

Our buying into other companies brands reflects on who we are. I wear Nike but does that mean I am good, bad, rich or poor? I call myself a christian does that mean I am good, bad, rude or forgiving? I work for a church (Youth Pastor) does that mean I am sheltered, ignorant or something else? We homeschool so does that mean we are afraid of the world, our kids are freaks and can’t deal with real life? Does it imply we have moved so often for work the online public school format fit our lives better? It is hard from the outside to know…. think about it!

Unfortunately, we are a byproduct of those around us, our heritage (even if we don’t know our biological history) and our environment. I am fooling myself to think I am not being influenced and influencing others at the same time by my dress attire, my attitude and what I wear, eat or even read.

We live in a world that is all about image and using that image to influence (often in a negative way) others to be aware or more tolerant of our personal cause or bias. It is happening today, and it happened in the past. We can assume it will continue into the future too. So, how do we manage and deal with it?

I think this is easier said than done…. so here goes

  1. Use discernment who and what you buy into. For example.. just don’t buy it because everyone else is.
  2. Use discernment in who or what you allow to influence you. For example a trusted wiser mature friend
  3. Be sure to be ground into some truth that is larger than you or your moment. For example the Bible.
  4. You might even take time before deciding on it. I met someone recently who waits 6 to 9 months before making a big decision to ensure it isn’t impulsive or dumb.

We have been gifted with the ability to think, reason and choose… so we should put those gifts to work in doing so.

We should pursue a brand that is worth supporting and attracting people too. Choose wisely.

Friends doing what Friends do

FRIENDS DOING WHAT FRIENDS DO!

I have a couple friends (D & J)out west… Yeah, they live in California where it is always 80 degrees and sunny (he reminds me often since two of us are from the Michigan area). Well, by the Instagram, Facebook and twitter post it always looks like shorts weather. When you are from the Midwest, this is a big deal… It is April and snowing outside this week.

Well these friends are pretty big hitters in the world of Youth Ministry but that isn’t the point in this blog post. The point is they do life together.

A few years ago, they had a dream… (well to be honest it probably started prior to that… One of them hired or strongly influenced the other to do Youth Ministry at his church
So, needless to say they go way back over ten years of building into this post example.

They started a ministry called Download Youth Ministry, a completely online store, tool to use. It isn’t a new idea but for the youth ministry world it was a fresh approach when it seems like everyone in the business was spinning tires to find traction.

These guys have a solid friendship and working relationship, which is the point to this post. People will assume they are successful due to a combined 50 years of Youth Ministry and countless books written, maybe some divine support from Fadi or simply luck but I think it begins with two things:

  1. Faithful friendship based on God and serving Him
  2. The ability to be friends and enjoy the time together.

In the beginning days at the developing stages they would meet after work (which means close to 10 to 11PM) at a local taco joint to do life, laugh and dream…. that dream became a reality in 2011 with their first domain purchase and it is now serving

The simple idea, God has blessed and Fadi has backed is now making impacts through:

  1. They host some amazing podcasters
  2. Downloadable material that is the core of the ministry / business
  3. A training (Discipleship) platform for both leaders and people.
  4. A community online through Facebook
  5. A special event only for 100 youth workers to attend and be breathed into and loved on.
  6. A video show… well It is more roundtable type but feels like you are sitting at the table alongside them talking ministry and life.
  7. Did I mention… purchasing YS… ? Yes, the organization that runs National Youth Worker Convention… that is the crazy thing in my mind. (both guys have been speaking at YS for years).

The core of what God did and does with this awesome business/ ministry is based on friendships and laughter and dreaming. We need to be intentional about building friendships (discipleship) and doing life together. The key is investing in each other as you grow together. The bible has a verse that says as “Iron sharpens Iron, so does one person sharpen another”. I think this is true for my friends (D & J). They are awesome as individuals but together as a team even more powerful for God.

I look forward to visiting, meeting with them when they come to the cold temps of the midwest and look forward to building into people in my influence. I enjoy laughing with them but I also will share time laughing with others in my community.

New Strengths.. Soar not Settle

New Strength

I was doing, well honestly catching up since I am meeting to discuss them with a couple friends tomorrow, my devotion times and it was simply titled New Strength.

The title wasn’t the eye catcher but the scripture was…

Isaiah 40:31 “ But those who wait on the Lord, Shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.

If you are or have been inside a church building or waked through a Christian Store you have experienced this in word or picture… A beautiful bald eagle soring in the wind… looking majestic and awesome.

I assume you might even have experienced it more than once, only to glimpse at it with a been there done that attitude. It is okay to admit it. I have more than I would like to but it is true, I have become desensitized to the beauty and impact of the mighty bald eagle soaring image.

I am not sure this one will hit every audience but I grew up in Michigan and moved to Indiana (eventually toward the Indiana and Ohio border by the Ohio river). I have been privileged enough to see a real bald eagle soaring over the water or setting on an ice chunk in the lake. Simply breathe taking! It is a site I will always cherish and remember. In fact, I could drive you to the very place I sat to observe this amazing bird of prey.

My point is simply we settle way to often for the image of static bird in a photo or picture when God has a soaring image of power, grace, breathless motion and awe. We have a choice in life…

  1. Settle for the normal everyday existence or
  2. Strive for the greatness to come, for an experience and life that is remember able and awe-inspiring.

It is simple as that… we get the ability to choose and I encourage you (me too) to not settle for the everyday static but strive to soar with the Eagles.

God has so much more to offer and provide for us but we tend to get caught up in the “everyone is doing it” mentality.

SOAR MY FRIENDS! Be one who breaks out into the greatness of life and soar.

New Years Resolutions

How do you launch your New Years resolutions? How do you plan to succeed in accomplishing them? Well, I think you might be surprised to read this information but most start them planning and practice to late to win.

I have a chiropractor friend, who I will refer to as Dr. James (since it is his name) that teaches his clients to begin the resolution or any new habit a month in advance to accomplish it. The idea is simply starting to create the habit, routine and disciplines.

We shared some time thinking and digesting this idea recently at youth group. I would like to share some highlights from this experience.

  1. Identify five major stresses in your life.
  2. Identify which you can change (control) and those you cannot control.
  3. Change those you can, give to God to those you cannot.

Philippians 4:6-7 reminds us to not work about things but pray.

  1. Who do you represent?
  2. Your clothes? Mine say DYM, YW, Nike, DHSM, Michigan etc.
  3. Your friendships?
  4. Your future?

We can discover a lot about our attention or life.
Leviticus 19:4 reminds us not to trust in idols but God.

  1. Review time… please refer back to the previous 1,2&3 and check for similarities? Is God trying to reveal something through them?
  2. Repair relationships.
  3. Who do you have conflict with?
  4. How can you forgive them? Or make the relationship better?

Ephesians 4:31-32 reminds us to get rid of all bitterness etc.. forgive one another as Christ forgives you.

  1. Make time for Jesus. Seems simple but it has to be a priority in our day.

1 Timothy 4:13-14 reminds us to devote ourselves to reading bible, praising God and teaching others.

  1. Spend time praying
  2. Make a top five list of things, habits etc you want to continue doing… for example devotion time, exercise daily.
  3. Make a top five list of things, habits etc you want to stop doing… for example cheating on tests, lying, talking bad about yourself..

1 Thessalonians 5:17 reminds us to never stop praying.

  1. What is the best time of day, week for you to pray?
  2. What can you do to make that happen?
  3. Who can support you in this commitment?

 

I know it is a huge list and seems to be overwhelming but I would totally encourage you to take the next month to get a routine and healthy habits to accomplish some growth.
I enjoy watching sports and often think it would be cool to play in the NFL or whatever… but I am not willing to do the work to accomplish that… Often we think of people who are spiritual champions and want to be like them… but we aren’t willing to do the time to be like Jesus.
Friends it will take work to make it a priority and we are all able to make them… after all we do everyday…

Happy New Habits day to you.

 

Athletes exercise self-control in all things

I was struck between the eyes when I read this statement. I have read it probably a thousand times and it never really hit me this deeply. I first need to confess…. It is a bible verse. 1 Corinthians 9:25 “Athletes exercise self-control in all things; they do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable one.” Paul is a stud for the church, his resume is rich… a Hebrew Check, a Pharisee (think religious leader who is way smarter than most) Check, a descendant of David (think big time lineage.. David’s name carries weight in the bible) Check.  Paul is also a noted to be the first missionary (establishing churches throughout modern-day Europe) Check, Paul was ship wrecked, thrown into prison etc. Check…

I was what I call an athlete in high school. I was a distance runner and accomplished some cool things. For example: 1986 set a school record for 4×800 relay that wasn’t touched till 2016. Ran Cross two years and went to state both years. My senior year in track I finished 1st in every dual meet in the 800 but I confess to not exercising self-control in all things.
For example, I practiced as I felt like it. I did not listen to the coach like I should have. I did not study as much as I should have. I can honestly say I never went to parties or drank etc. so that is good. But as you can see I was not interested in self-control completely.

What is Paul trying to get at with the comment? I feel as if he is prompting us to put our whole selves in to being who God created us to be. We need to fully exercise self-control in all areas of our life so we can be free of distraction or settling for less than the best.
So, if you are a student… focus on your education, give it all (be the best you can in the classroom), do not worry about relationship that really cause you to settle for less than your best, Do not fight the teacher but learn from them.
So, if you are an athlete… listen to your coach, give it all you can and practice patience in your exercise but give it to the full when you should, take care of your body.
So, if you are an employee… do the best you can do.. show up ready to work, be on time and grow to be the best employee you can. Someone will experience your product or presence that it should impact their life.

I think you get my point. It is important to be focussed on growing you and those around you. Help others as they help you. Be focussed and ready.

I know Paul lived a long time ago but we need to heed his warning and focus on self-control and step up to be a role model for someone. Please do not act like you aren’t one because everyone has someone looking up to you. Go for it and win in life.

Perspective… does it matter?

It has been a while since I have last blogged.. but maybe you aren’t aware of that tidbit. Well, until I mentioned it.

I have been very busy with life, work and COS (think college without credit). But the very topic is the topic of discussion today. Perspective!

Perspective… the dictionary.com refers to it as a mental view point,

I have to admit I function 70% of the time within my own perspective. That being said, I admit to focusing on what I see. The lenses I see through most of the time are based on the following criteria…. Do your own list too..

  • Parents had me later in life (parents in mid 40’s); most thought they were my grandparents.
  • My sister is 20 years older than me; most thought she was my mom.
  • I have an identical twin; we don’t dress or act alike. (twin day isn’t really twin day it is dress like your best friend day.. we wouldn’t dress alike on purpose)
  • I am married to Shelly; therefore one man and one woman-married matters to me.
  • I have been blessed with four kids; therefore saying you have a handful with your two kids doesn’t carry a ton of weight for me.. if you say 6 then I am praying for you.
  • I was born in Michigan, therefore I am a Michigan fan; most think this it true. Or they should lol.
  • I refer to Michigan as God’s country; most don’t get it until they visit West Michigan.. Then they believe or are just in denial.
  • I am a youth minister; most think I am holier than them, nope just saved through grace like we all are.
  • I have a full time job; most think I have the weekends off.. nope Monday is my day off
  • Since I am a pastor I am always working; the reality is I need down time too.
  • If I don’t write it down it will not happen; most who know me know this truth.. it is a fact!
  • I have 3 girls and a son; most think I wanted kids until a son is born; reality is God blessed us with 4 individually awesome unique kids..
  • Most think my kids are or should be perfect due to my employment; however they are still kids and I can’t assume your kids is a rocket scientist because you are can I? for argument I do know a rocket scientist and his kids aren’t rock scientists….

I think you get my point…

So how do we deal with perspective?

The news has been all over cop shootings, cops shooting people and black lives matter.

I have been taught to respect authority, to care for and respect all life and everyone matters. I have been struggling to watch videos and news footage of people killing people, then people retaliating on people (even though they are different people than the one they had issues with) and so forth. It is a vicious cycle.

One video I watched showed an older white male trying to walk down the street, through a demonstration of black lives matter (African American women) who wouldn’t let him pass… they were making a point that black lives matter but demonstrated our protest (example) matters more than you walking down the street.

I know several police officers who are very good people. They care about their community, and being a safe person for those in need. They will do their job to the best of their ability within the law. They love their kids, they wives and work hard to keep us safe. They would never just shoot someone… in fact the ones I know have never drawn a gun on someone. They would rather avoid conflict than create it. Plus one said it is a lot of paperwork and who likes paperwork.

 

I have four kids (mentioned before) and they are all uniquely different. I am figuring out something finally. They are all wired differently and I need to adjust to their perspective if I am going to be used by God to help shape them into the people He has created them to be. I admit…. Most of the time I fail at this because I am concerned about my perspective not theirs.
I have done some poor perspectives when it comes to helping them grow, being a safe place for them to turn. It is a two way street but I always need to be the one looking at their perspective and determining the best communications possible to connect with them. Again.. I fail often here.. if you would ask them I would guess they would say fail more than not but it is perspective.

 

When someone sees me in the community, they assume I am working and bring up a work need or situation. However they wouldn’t think of being asked a question about their employment when they aren’t at work.. see the perspective changes how we respond to people. I admit again, times I fail at remembering their perspective and helping them learn mine.

 

As I mentioned before, I am in COS and our class is based on several books, bible books and writings. One of the objectives was to take strength finders assessment. This assessment helps you know your strengths with the hope you will focus to grow them more than you try to grow your weaknesses. The book (resources) believes it is better to grow your strengths and help others grow theirs as we align with others who have different strengths than we do to accomplish certain tasks. I felt this was a great way of looking at things but realize.. it is also perspective.

 

I am closing out this portion of the blog (which should be multiple posts but isn’t) with a thought.

How much better would our life be, our world be if we would take a deep breathe and look at it from others perspectives.. This might help us understand we all have needs, wants, opinions and perspectives. No one’s perspective is wrong to them, it is just that a perspective.

We can change the world by changing ourselves and looking to view things through others perspectives not assuming they all know ours….

 

 

 

How do you enjoy the process when you are not sure where you are going?

I had a very busy morning… running to the local Junior High for bible study, then home to transport one of my kids to school, followed by a trip to a local coffee shop for a meeting… it seems to never end..

This got me thinking about two things…

  1. the bible study material for this morning and
  2. the act of going and not always feeling I am knowing where…

First things first…

Our bible study was about praising God for WHO He is and for WHAT he created or did for us.

Psalm 150 .. the final chapter if you will in the book of Psalms. It says, “ Praise the Lord! Praise God in his sanctuary; Praise him for his mighty deeds; praise him according to his excellent greatness!

Praise him with trumpet sound; praise him with lute and harp! Praise him with tambourine and dance, praise him with strings and pipe! Praise him with sounding cymbals! Praise him with loud clashing cymbals!

Let everything that has breath praise the Lord! Praise the Lord!

The teacher talked about the WHO and WHAT but it was totally cool when she talked about them when.

  1. Praise him with quiet music, and silence
  2. Praise him with loud music and talking..
  3. Praise him .. even the birds praise him.. when we aren’t doing so.

Second thing…

Going without a clue where I am heading..

I feel for people especially students these days. I feel for them because the world has this idea of knowing where you are going.. Kids are required, forced and encouraged to know what they will become.
We ask each 5 year old what do you want to be when you grow up?

We ask people we meet in junior high what college you thinking about?

We ask high school students what are their career plans?

It isn’t fair..

Reflecting back on my youth….

As a senior in high school… my plan was simple… graduate.. have fun and don’t worry more than you need too. I was a worrier big time.

I remember clearly the day my parents set me down and asked the troubling question….
What are you planning to do now? I must have looked confused… so they helped me out some…

Dad said, “ will you be going to college or work?” I was slightly offended by the question but as an adult parent I think… well that is a solid question for sure.. I chose college and wasted a ton of money.

So friends, why do we need to know those answers? Is it for our comfort? Is it to compare what others are doing? Is it to give us a feeling of acceptance?

I don’t know a good answer but I do know God knows what it happening and what will happen. I can be searching and content at the same time.

My one caution is to be careful when asking questions that might rock someone’s world in an unhealthy way.

We also need to remember to praise God in a variety of ways and times… He is worthy of our praise.

Looking at the man in the mirror

I’m going to make a change
For once in my life
It’s gonna feel real good
Gonna make a difference, gonna make it right…

The above is the beginning to Michael Jackson’s song called Man in the mirror.

I was flipping through the music stations as I drove back form dropping my daughter off to school. Then it hits me, a flash back from the past…
Michael Jackson singing man in the mirror… wow but reality brought me back.

I was listening to the song in a different light since the early 1990’s when I first heard the song as a middle/high school song. I confess back then it was another Michael Jackson song… bring out the blinged glove and some smooth moon walking… For you young readers… look up moon walking … I would rather not relive those moments…

Today is just another day of the week but for some odd reason, maybe it was due to driving in the fog of the morning, maybe it is the reality of being tired at 9AM with a to do list a mile long (who came up with that analogy anyways) and not enough time to get it all done….. when Michael says:

“ I’m starting with the man in the mirror. I’m asking him to change his ways. And no message could have been any clearer. If you wanna make the world a better place. Take a look at yourself and then make a change….”

Those words carry more weight today…
Maybe it is due to the difference in life then and now…

Then…. I looked out for me. I went to school, played sports, played video games, went out with my friends or on a date. I spent time with family and some summer work.

Now… I look our for me and my family, team at work, friends and others, I go to school to teach or visit students (worry about them surviving the day). I don’t play as many video games, do less sports (more due to being old), and worry about the today, tomorrow and the next.. for all I know and work alongside.

What is the common core… Me… I am in both situations, my life is still full of the same 24 hours in a day that I had back in the day. I am in control of the ability to look in the mirror and change me..
Our world tells us to make excuses for our actions, to fill our schedules with stuff to do, baseball games, movies, vacations, work etc.. , to spend spend spend and enjoy today.

I get the privilege of sharing time with Students … today we discussed spending time with God. Through out the New Testament Jesus withdrawals often in the morning to a quiet place… in the beginning God created everything in 6 days and the 7th he rested..

What this guy realizes when I look at the man in the mirror is way to much and personal for this blog but a simple observation is this…

I need to rest…. Here are a few areas in my life I need rest in:
Sleep.. I require a solid amount of sleep. I need to have down time from work, from noise, from being around people.
One of my strengths is being an extreme extrovert and when I am feeling the need to avoid people.. I know I need to look at the man in the mirror and say make a change… I know people need you … I know you are the man but the reality is I need a break..
I would encourage you today to look at the person in the mirror… look often and don’t fall to the sin of nitpicking what you look like.. that isn’t healthy… but looking at who you are and what you need is…

I close with this wisdom….”I am starting with the man in the mirror. I’m asking him to change his ways. And no message could have been any clearer…” make the time to make the change

The assumed

I am continually consumed and battle with the idea of assumed. For example:

  • since I am a pastor, people assume I know God better than others
  • since I am a youth worker, people assume I know everything about parenting teenagers.
  • since I am a white male, people assume I don’t struggle with stereotypes, being seen as a productive person in society etc..
  • since I am a public figure, people assume I am always enjoy being in the spot light.
  • since I am pastor, people assume I work the same schedule as they do.
  • since I am a leader, people assume I always know what is going on.
  • since I am a twin, people assume I feel everything my twin does.

I am sure this could go on and on and on… and you have your own set of assumes… some of the assumptions above maybe close to accurate but most of them are not even close to being truth.

So, what can I do about it? What can you do about your assumption list?

I know the answer is not an easy one but simply put, we can help educate people to some truths and not assume they know.  Here we go:

  • when some one suggests I know God more, I can help them realize we all struggle and those in the bible did too.
  • when some suggests I know it all or I am a great parent, I can help them realize I struggle with parenting too. It is a serious deal.
  • when someone suggests only people of different color or etc. struggle with stereotypes, I can help them realize we all struggle with it.. try being a white, balding youth minister who is a twin…..
  • when someone assumes I am working on Monday… I can help them realize it is my off day, a day not spent working… also I can not take phone calls and on my message say hey it is Monday and I am off today.. I will call you back tomorrow.

I often assume… much like we all do… we assume a lot about others and sometimes organizations without taking them time to learn and better understand. I admit it takes time to learn and understand, maybe that is the issue, it requires time.

I am feeling challenged in my life to assume less and look to learn more. How about you?

I AM A BELIEVER! What about you?

I am a believer!

What do you believe?
Do you believe it will be ok?
Do you believe you will succeed in life?
Do you believe you can do great things?
Do you believe in yourself?
Do you believe God is creator?
Do you believe Jesus will save you?
Do you believe Jesus is preparing a place for you in heaven?

I am often filled with do you believe questions.. 

One Is usually, do I believe people will show up? Do I believe I am good enough? Do I believe I have what it takes to accomplish the task?

I assume you have your own set of “Do I believe” statements…. Maybe it would be good to take a minute to list them? That is totally up to you.

How much of the do I believes matter?

Don’t get me wrong but do they matter if we don’t do anything with the question..
We need to take action at some point to put it into practice, to begin working out the question into a statement… for example:

I believe it will be ok.
I believe I will succeed.
I believe I can do great things and be an impact person.
I believe in myself… not arrogantly but believe I have worth.
I believe God created all things
I believe Jesus saves me and prepares a place for me.

But there is a little gap between the question and the fact of belief. 

I truly know in my heart nobody makes it on belief alone… It takes time and work to work out one’s belief.

Here is a simple suggestion, surround yourself with people …

who will believe in you,…
who will keep you humble,…
who will encourage you,…
who will help you make a plan to accomplish your goals

I heard this is a recent sermon…. And it wrecked my world…

Believing in something is easy but having faith (living out that belief) isn’t easy.

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